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Tara

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My name's Tara, and I live in the fabulous city of Atlanta (go Braves!) I enjoy reading, music, and long walks in the park. When I'm not busy lusting over Derrick from the Real World/Road Rules Challenge on MTV, I enjoy trying my hand in the kitchen. My family are genuine, "straight off the boat" It...

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Forever in (Tight) Blue Jeans.

I learned a very important lesson this week – never make an entire pan of anything unless you have at least one other person to share it with.

I’m hoping that obsessive food cravings truly do accompany PMS, because if they don’t, then I’m having my jaw wired tomorrow. Yesterday, I simply could not get the food in fast enough, and that was fine by me. Most of this was due to a decadent lasagna that (for some unknown reason) I felt compelled to make. Today, on the other hand, I’m feeling slightly like a beached whale, and I’m wondering if a fast is in order. Nah.

For those who are really interested, the following is a detailed listing of my gluttony from yesterday:

Breakfast: Lasagna (it always tastes best overnight.)

Lunch: Spinach salad (see – I at least tried to be healthy.)

Snack: More lasagna, two ice-cream sandwiches, and a granola bar.

Dinner: Frozen Chinese food (Orange Chicken, to be exact.)

Snack: Another piece of lasagna.

I tossed the pan in the garbage before hitting the sack last night.

Yes – yesterday, my mantra was “If I eat all of it, then it won’t be there to gorge on anymore!” (whatever that means.) But I’m being forgiving of myself, because tomorrow marks three weeks that I’ve gone without a cigarette. Come to think of it, I could very well be substituting smokes with food (please God, don’t let it be so!) If I eat half as much as I smoked, I’ll be able to sign up for this year’s mall Santa!

I can’t believe it’s already October. Christmas – here we come!

I feel really confident with this quit. For some reason, I know that I’m done with that filthy habit, and I’m not mourning the loss in any way. Perhaps being unemployed has helped somewhat, in that I don’t have the daily stress of a corporate environment to contend with. I’ve also taken to more intense exercising in the mornings, coupled with the greatest hits of Chopin in the evenings. Both have a strange and calming affect on me. Oh yeah, and I’ve been listening to lots of Neil Diamond as well.

Who doesn’t feel good when listening to Neil?

But if I had to pinpoint only one reason why this time is different, I’d have to attribute it to those teenagers I’m mentoring at my church. The thought of me lighting up in front of any one of them fills me with shame; I could never do such a thing. Something about having to be or do something for other people makes change that much easier for me. I wonder why it’s never enough to do what’s best for you and you alone.

Hey, whatever works, right?